Earlier this week, I was at my physical therapy appointment and I heard myself say, "I am not able to do yoga right now even though I love it and it would be good for my injured shoulder, because there isn't a class that fits my schedule." Did you hear it? I did. I heard myself say that I had decided to be a victim of schedules, mine and theirs. I wanted to do yoga; I knew it would be good for me, but I was planning to continue to miss out because of some silly scheduling issues. As soon as I heard it, I was free to change it. As long as it was just in my head, I couldn't see through the self-deception to the truth of it-that schedules are meant to be changed, that it was within my power to create a schedule that would allow me to do yoga.
I am no longer willing to be a victim of my own thinking. The only cure for that is to make sure that I am telling my story to other people, the day to day story and the bigger story that is my life. As a therapist and person who is often in need of healing or of direction, I know the power of sharing one's thoughts and feelings. Sometimes it can be as simple as the comment I made to my physical therapist; other times it needs to be as deliberate and profound as making the decision to enter into an on-going relationship with a therapist, counselor, or mentor. But, make no mistake, to be whole, we must be heard.
I found a yoga class that fits the slightly altered schedule I created for myself.